Would you enjoy a little edgy 'guy' humor? Yeah, thought so.If an Exorcist isn't needed when your monthly friend comes to visit -that's a HUGE plus.Can you be good to go in a wicked pair of CFM stilettos without it taking a Herculean effort....AND, you can be ready before the 2nd coming of Christ?If you're an actress / model your aspirations hopefully include more than flying into Vegas to strip every weekend.. (ok, ok... I'm Mr. Compromise - not every weekend.)When you miss your maintenance day you don't break out in hives or anything resembling a bipolar disorder. Nor do you throw child-like tantrums when your spousal support check is a day late. You're also not compelled to dissect all our conversations with your therapist. Another plus is if your laced boy shorts don't get all twisted when your illegal alien maid incorrectly folds your Ed Hardy t-shirts. (Hopefully you've never purchased anything Ed Hardy).What's your level of education or street savvy?A) Well, hopefully it's high enuf to know that Mexico's a country - not a race.B) Your grasp of the English language allows you to begin your profile sentences with words other than " I ". (Note: WE ALL understand this may be a rather difficult task if you've never been married nor had children).C) You know Prez Barry is not our first black prez.. (He is our first mulatto prez. Or 'bi-racial' if you're hip and you 'feel' we must include the entire globe to not offend anyone.)D) It's a two-parter:1) You can easily explain a woman's math when she's looking for a "generous" male or "financial and emotional support" (please, use U.S. dollars of course)2) You can easily explain why women who desire their man make 150K, list their man's occupation as "No preference."E) You know that judaism is just another organized religion - not an ethnicity nor a race. Though purchasing a seat in their front row pew is quite expensive.F) You can easily explain why the name " Washington Redskins" is offensive....yet, the "Apache"Helicopter and a "Tomahawk" Missile are ok.G) If you're blessed to have had several children (even if by multiple daddies),....hey, good for you! But, please make the visitation schedule easier to follow than IKEA assembly instructions.Lastly, your woman's intuition keenly recognizes that simultaneously applying mascara, drinking a skinny vanilla latte, and texting the latest drama while operating a motor vehicle isn't necessarily the wisest behavior.Did you laugh a little today? Good, then my work here is finished for now. ;)Ok, I'll be serious for a moment - but only for a moment.. Most of the world doesn't have a roof over their heads nor a grocery store down the corner - so really, how big can your problems be? Besides, 99% of the time, the things we worry about NEVER HAPPEN anyway.So having stated that, at this stage of my life, it's definitely more about meeting exceptional people then conquering the world (though I still sharpen my swords daily to slay dragons in the concrete jungle. ;) To remain grateful for what I have and not focus on what I do not. To be 100 % in the moment and not looking at a phone / emails.

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Executive Gopher

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